Buttons - And a 38 Special

Within the last, say, 3-4 years there as been only a few weeks that my suit jacket looked appropriate while buttoned, and I will say that was back in December.


Other than that, I looked better with it unbuttoned.

For the past 3-4 years I kept my jacket open because when I buttoned my sport coat I looked like a python who swallowed a pig. More than thrice I had to have buttons replaced because of the taut strain on the thread. And then, for the past 3-4 months buttoning my roomy jacket made it look like two schooner sails held together with a safety pin. The time for basking in the glow of my two-sizes too big clothes is over, I am beginning to look like a clown.

Today I picked up a few clothing items at Filene's Basement, mostly for my golf trip. I found some golf trousers and went to the dressing room. I had butterflies in my stomach like it was the silent moment before the opening kick-off. For years I was fitting into a size 42" waist for trousers, and often size 44" to ensure appropriate roominess. I brought in a 40" and a 38."

My goal is to wear 38" again. Years ago, any sort of brand name pant topped out at 38," but in more recent years 40" became quite regular, and the maximum being 42." Some store brands started to stock only 38"s in the store, but 40"s and 42"s were available on their website. I first noticed this with Eddie Bauer brand trousers about 8 years go when 38"s on me went from cutting off the circulation in my waist to impossible to even touch button to eyelet. I remember being totally fine with this clothing discrimination since shame on me for getting so large, and no man, no matter how tall should ever have greater than a 38” waist. Well as the years went on and the American waist became steadfastly rotund it was not hard to find 42”s in even the highest end of brands.

I pulled on my Callaway golf khakis, size 38” – I was bold enough to try these on after a full lunch – and they fit! They were tight to be sure since I still have another 20 lbs to go, but I can’t remember the last time I buttoned a size 38”! For golf trousers I like them very loose, so I went with the 40”s, but they are still two sizes smaller than my last purchase!

I went to the suit jackets - a steady size 50 Long, I fit into a 46 Long in that European fashion snug look. The 48 Long was just a bit too roomy.

Since the 38”s were fasted around my waist, though tight in the thighs and rear end, I have no doubt I will be in the 38”s for my regular trousers in a few weeks, and my new goal is 36”! In fact, on suspicion I dug into my old rugby kit bag, and pulled out my tattered 20 year-old game shorts – yep, 36”.